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I’m sharing this story after ten years. It took me time to write this because I thought it was not necessary. But after the recent news about a sexually harassed woman official, I felt the need to finally tell my story. I’m also writing this as a thank you and an apology to my mother, who is also a one-of-a-kind woman. She was the one who told of the news. I initially sided to the perpetrators; my mother just remained silent.
I kept quiet for ten years because I hoped it will never happen again to anyone. Ten years after, it is still happening.
Do not worry. For those of you who are about to say “OMG,” relax. What I’m about to tell you was not done to me.
But surprisingly, I got myself involved. If you knew me very well, I’m not the confrontational type.
I just graduated from college, trying to work my way in the employment world. I was in my first job as a telephone operator in a freight forwarding company. Since I was also monitoring the main fax line of our office, it was part of my job to coordinate with the Supply Officer so that I don’t run out of facsimile paper. In the freight forwarding business, a delay may mean a lost business for us. I made sure that I never ran out of supplies.
Our Supply Officer is a man, who also serves as a truck driver and warehouse monitoring guy. With the kind of responsibility he had, he was considered as one of the trusted men of our boss (which was a big deal in our company, because our boss was very strict). Rumor has it that among the men employees there, he was the most arrogant.
It was time again to request for facsimile papers, so I went out of my small, glass-enclosed room for a few minutes to talk to Mr. Supply Officer. Not long after I returned in the room, he appeared with my request on hand. He passed it through the small hole of the room’s glass.
The hole may be small, but what I heard from him resounded.
“Hoy, Belinda (not her real name)! Huwag ka munang umuwi; isasama kita sa beerhouse. Lalaki ka naman, hindi ba? Wala kang dibdib eh!” (Hey, Belinda! Don’t go home yet; I’ll bring you to the beerhouse. You’ll love it there; you could pass for a guy. You’re a flat chest!)
He was referring to one of my female officemates, who just got out of our office’s main door to go home. What he said were heard by many, if not all, in the office.
I was surprised by what I heard. Yes, it is true: my woman officemate is not well-endowed, but for him to just say it matter-of-factly was way overboard.
I found myself confronting Mr. Supply Officer.
“Bakit mo uli isasama si Ma’m Belinda sa beerhouse?” (Say, why do you want her to tag along again?) I said. I was kind of hoping for a changed answer.
“Eh lalaki ‘yan eh. Wala s’yang dibdib,” (She passes up for a guy. She’s flat-chested.) he replied with a smirk.
Hope’s gone. He just repeated his reason with remorse.
Without battling an eyelash and with a glare that could kill, I blurted out, “Porke wala s’yang dibdib, lalaki na s’ya?” (Just because she’s not well-endowed doesn’t mean she’s a guy.)
He looked at me, and then retreated with a discomfit laugh. My glaring eyes followed him until he was out of my sight.
That was unbelievable. We are living in the twenty-first century, yet there are still barbarians lurking around.
My regret was that what I did was not enough. I could have told my boss or our Human Resources Officer about the incident. But I never did. I was a new employee and I admit: I felt I did not have a voice; that what happened would just be one of those “joke times for women” in another ordinary day.
What I found out months later was our boss took the driving and warehouse monitoring from Mr. Supply Officer. Though I never knew the reason for the change, still, revenge is sweet.
What I just shared never stopped a husband for hurting his wife.
My story never suspended the female circumcision that’s still happening in some African countries.
Heck, it never even stopped some heartless men from raping, abusing, or trafficking women.
One thing that I knew was when I did that, I knew I stood up for what was right.
Nanindigan ako para sa kapwa ko. Nanindigan ako para sa kapwa ko babae. Nanindigan ako para sa sarili ko.
I pray I would not have to get involved in the same situation.
But if I do, I know I would do more than a glare.
